Okay, so you asked about V:tM characters, and holy crap I’ve had to run for some terrible ones. There was this one guy that loved to make terrible Setites. He was the one who nagged me until I agreed to run the stupid game in the first place. Apparently, he just wanted to vomit up some horrible Stus. There was one character he INSISTED on playing in every game he could, forcing me to (after the fact) reconcile my plot with every other vampire game he’d ever been in because “it was the story of [character]’s life.” OH, SO GLAD YOU LET ME KNOW THAT AHEAD OF TIME. MASSIVE SARCASM QUOTES.
This character was named Natasha Pavell Alexsei Illyanakopf, and he was originally a seventh-gen Setite…. until he randomly decided he was a 5th-gen all along, and the childe of Nefertiti…. whom he also played. Pavell loved to kidnap mortal dudes, sire them, and have them altered to look exactly like him. I have no idea why. By the time he got to my game, he RANDOMLY decided he was in the Inconnu, and working on Golconda. Of course, being freshly transitioned from the Path of fucking Typhon, he knew SO MUCH MORE about Golconda than, for example, my Salubri. (As a side note, this guy also ran a game in which he wholesale ripped off Eternal Darkness, except he replaced Pious Augustus with FUCKING PAVELL.)
Then he got bored with Pavell, and decided to make another 5th-gen Setite, this one named Robert Varda Fillengaine (I don’t even know anymore). This guy, aside from having the most ridiculous stats I have ever seen, was horrendously overpowered. He had all the Potence, all the Dominate, all the Serpentis, all the Fortitude… none of which were actually on his sheet. His entry into the game came when he lolrandomly decided to murder a bunch of college girls with a prop sword. He was supposed to be working for Nefertiti, who was our main antagonist at the time, until he decided he was going to betray her and help the PCs. Aaaand then he got bored with that and was working for Nefertiti the whole time. *facepalm* Oh, and this douche looked “exactly like Hugh Jackman.”
Bored with Setites, he decided to make a psychotic Lasombra. THIS dude, Tyger Shelley, decided to OMG RANDOMLY murder people to try to provoke another player’s character to frenzy. (This character was the biggest Sue I’ve ever seen; she comes later.) I made him lose a lot of Humanity for that, and he decided that meant he suddenly developed a split personality. One was Tyger, and he was the DARK one. He had all the Obtenebration powers. Shelley, on the other hand, was the LIGHT one, and this guy kept trying to convince me to let him come up with a light-based Discipline like Obtenebration. I said NO. So he decided his character turned into an angel and ascended into heaven. I’m not kidding. He really said that.
His last terrible character was a literal self-insert. He wanted to play himself as a vampire, but only the super specialest of clans would do for him. He wanted to be a True Brujah, but he didn’t have to worry about that pesky no emotions thing. He just acted like the disaffected hipster douche he already was and called that good enough.
There was also a player in this game who was probably legitimately crazy. The only other character he ever played was a pretty stereotypical Dark Ages Brujah. After playing Redemption, I saw that this player had basically copypasted Christof and called it an OC. That guy wasn’t too bad. I had NO IDEA what hell I was in for when I let this psycho play a Tzimisce. He started out eighth-gen, which was the PC generation limit. (I tried.) He went around behind the other players backs, collecting all the clues and helpful NPCs I had, making sure no other players could progress in the plot. This led to over half of my players walking out. Once he had a stable of captive, blood bound NPCs, he moved in under the hospital and started building a lair of flesh. He had this fucking bunker full of weapons he didn’t ask me about and horrible Vicissitude things he never bought the ability to do. He also modified himself into what was basically a war form without paying the experience price for it. He looked like a xenomorph, and expected to have the same advantages. And that’s when he started really getting crazy. He wanted koldunic sorcery, which is largely unavailable in the modern age, so he decided my Tremere NPC could teach him. (Like that would happen.) Then he started fusing people into walls, terrorizing the players in and out of character, and randomly lowered his generation. The creepiest part was when, in regular conversation, he would start talking and acting like his character. He decided to name this abomination Adam Kadamon.
Then there was this girl…. she had no ideas for a character, so I tried to help her out. She was a 10th-gen Malkavian named Daria Brahms (a name she didn’t come up with), and I made her the childe of the former Malkavian primogen. The basic plot of this game was that every supernatural inhabitant of the city had vanished, and the PCs were supposed to find out what happened before they met the same fate. However, even when making her the childe of one of the victims, she was not motivated to do anything about it. She sat through every Elysium like a lump, and when forced to go out on missions, did not participate. That was probably the reason Tyger Shelley tried to provoke her, but she refused to roleplay her character in frenzy. She just said, “I can’t do anything, she’s crazy.” So I made her character accidentally kill a mortal.There were a ton of witnesses, so she had to be punished. To be fair to her, the prince character (the most patient Brujah in the world) set up a trial for her, so she could defend herself. She refused to speak. She wouldn’t listen to reason and she wouldn’t respond to an emotional appeal, so the Prince backhanded her. She acted like nothing happened. So finally, another character demanded that she convince them that her character deserved to live. Still, she sad nothing. So, after two hours of this nonsense, I had the character killed.
So the player ran shrieking into the bathroom and locked herself in for THREE HOURS, wailing and crying because her favorite character died. The player’s boyfriend eventually got her out. A few months pass, and she is still throwing a fit about this stupid character. Eventually I gave in and let her be torpored instead of killed. Little did I know I was loosing the ultimate Sue. When she got out, she decided that instead of being a twentysomething white blonde lady, she was a dark skinned, white haired young teenager. She went straight to the prince and his brother’s house, deciding to tell them she was the brother’s “long lost childe” named Tori. (Only because I vetoed her being “his child from the future like Chibiusa!!!1) Being a very good man, he decided to shoulder the burden and take care of this deadweight. She moved in and proceeded to creepily latch on to the brother, trying to alienate him from everyone around him. She randomly developed telepathy and sparklypoo healer powers, and was no longer a vampire. Oh, and she was an angel the whole time. Even when she was a vampire.
As an “angel,” she wasn’t any more proactive of a character. She just waifed around the house, waiting for people to ask why she was “upset,” or merrily skipping off to into every obvious trap I set. I decided to punish her for her stupidest decision (invading a Methuselah’s house to get back a locket) by having her idiocy get someone killed. Once again, the player locked herself in the bathroom, crying for three hours until I said none of it happened. After that, she decided her character was actually in love with the prince’s brother, even though she had passed herself off as someone no older than 14. She was a very childlike character, and she never discussed the change in relationship in or out of character. (The prince’s brother was not available, either, but since when does free will matter to Sues?) She decided it was TRUE LOVE FOREVER AND EVER, and started whining out of character at me to get rid of the love interest so she could be his girlfriend. (He wasn’t straight, either…) I refused for two years, even when she literally threw herself on the ground screaming and crying. So she had Tori “kill herself,” turn back into a white girl, go goth, and rename herself “Yami.”
I quit the game then.